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| Smooth Sailing - Lake Ontario |
Have you ever watched a trades person work or a professional or even a clerk handle a situation and said to yourself "boy, you were born to do this". On the other hand, there are instances when you have to deal with some people be it at work or in the course of your daily life and you stop and wonder "what the heck are you doing in this job"!
I was mulling over a situation where a new employee at a company who was hired to help the team in their development has managed to create a hostile environment where the majority of said team is upset. Some have even expressed feelings looking for the exit door! Consider a scenario where the farmer gets a guard dog to watch the hen house and the said guard dog start eating the chickens!
This brought me back to thirty something years ago when problems started to develop in my marriage. Even thirty plus years ago I was forward thinking enough to seek professional advice. Being young and broke I booked an appointment with a counsellor at the Government run family services office. I went in and sat down and the "counsellor" - yes I put it in quotation marks because I don't know what school she went to - asked me to tell her what was happening and why I came. I started to tell her my story, her immediate reaction was "lady you are flogging a dead horse"! I just took up my purse, got up and left. I come to you, the professional with a problem, and if that's how you are going to handle it, thanks but no thanks.
So began my journey into self-help. After all I am a smart woman and there are tons of books written on these matters. Over the years I have had the privilege of meeting many people in the field of Counselling, Personal Coaching Spiritual Teachers and just good human beings that I have been able to tap into their wisdom on matters to help my personal, family and business life. Take my friend Rose (+Rosita Allen of +Little Black Rose Family Services) for instance, she is an expert at working with children and families and she is one who was born to do what she does. I tell her that all the time!
Now, there is doggy school, where people take their pooches to get them trained in doggy manners and you think that some folks would realize that working in certain capacity that requires tact, compassion, diplomacy and just regular consideration would know to work on themselves in order to be more effective in dealing with people in their chosen careers would be a no brainer. As +Amanda Marshall so skilfully sing "Everybody have a story to tell", and so everybody has something to work on. My immediate take on the Government employee counsellor was that she was a man hater, and even though I was having difficulties with my relationship I would not join forces with that type of thinking so I passed up on free and sought out help elsewhere.
What do you say to someone who is frustrated with a colleague, co-worker, a boss or their neighbour
from hell? Think about where they may be coming from, that's what you say. Their behaviour has nothing to do with you. Have compassion for their pain and work on yourself because it is not your job to fix them but they came your way to show you where you are at so pay attention and fix yourself. I am reminded of a story a friend told me about a lady who was in her Bible Study Group. they were studying LOVE, and this bible thumping die hard Pentecostal lady announced that she HATES her boss! Well, I guess from that perspective she was in the right place. My friend offered her a different take on her hostile situation with her boss and how to approach the problem, she took the advice. Needless to say, by the end of their course the said announced that she and her boss were getting along great and she had even gotten a promotion.
I love these outcomes, don't you? Walk good and remember "Everybody has a story to tell".
MissSam
Saturday June 7, 2014
