BEEN THINKING ABOUT MENTORING

I had to drive across the city recently and as I made my way across town, I passed a skating rink and immediately my  first thought was "gee, this is still here"!  It was a Friday afternoon quite a few children and young people were enjoying the lovely skating weather.  The reason I had that response was because more than 30 years ago, I used to take these to young boys, recently emegrated from Jamaica, skating at that very rink.  I was just 22 or 23 at the time.  You see, like so many other immigrant families, the mother had come ahead, got situated and went back for the husband and her two boys.  Not long after they arrived, she had a third child.  With a young baby to look after, and hardly any relatives around, I thought I'd help the young fellows break out into Canadian life.  They enjoyed it.  One was also a stamp collector, so I became a stamp collector and since I worked in an office, I would get neat stamps from around the world for him.  I still have my stamp collections!  As they got assimilated into the school system and their community, they were able to hold their own and those activities ended.

Today, the stamp collector is a very successful professional, travelling to many of the places those stamps came from.  The other is also quite successful in his chosen career, and baby?  Doing very, very well. 

I looked back on my life and realized that I've been mentoring children and young people for a very very long time.  I was born to do this, this is my passion, this is my calling, this is my purpose in life.  Every single person that I have mentored has been impactful.  I remember meeting a young girl, she was about eight years old, at an appointment to discuss life insurance with her mother.  I enquired how she was doing in school, and if she love to read.  I encouraged to to read, and promised some of my daughters books.  My daughter was and still is a bookworm.  I made it a point to pack a box on books and delivered it to her home.  When she was about sixteen, her mother was coming to my office to meet me, she told her mom "I like her, can I come with you?"  This young lady finished highschool, will soon be graduating from one of this city's fine universities and since senior year worked at a prestegious law office in town.  Why is this significant, at the time I met her, her mom was divorced, living in one of the most stigmatised communities in this city.  This young woman is a shining example to many young girls.

There are so many examples I can give about the creative ways I've helped individuals pull through difficult situations, turn their life 360degrees.  One last example, when my children were little, I was introduced to this young woman who found herself with a baby boy, no job, baby father no where to be found.  The child was malnurished and hyperactive.  The only way I could help her was to hire her to babysit my children, so I took them out of daycare and took in her and her baby in my appartment!  She stayed with us about two years.  By the time she was leaving, baby blossomed and she got herself together and was dating someone who care for her and her son.  My children loved her dearly and the littleboy was like a brother to them. We kept in touch after she left but after a while lost contact.  Many years later I ran into her at a store in the suburn community where I had moved to.  She had gotten married, became a homeowner in the suburbs and  her son was now a teanager and was doing well in school.  She had even changed his first name as I had suggested because the name she gave him was, in my view, was not one that elicited blessings.  She was estatic when she saw me in the store that day.

Looking back, I wonder, how did I do this?  What made me do this? I am from a family that help people, if someone needs help, my mother never thought about how helping is going to affect her, she only focus her attention on how she can help, and same with me.  Helping and mentoring is rooted in my DNA.  It never ceases to amaze me as to how many bible thumping christians are out there and when someone needs help, their attitude - not my problem.  All these problems we have in society will all but disappear if we only live out faith, practice what we preach!  Easier said than done, I know, because effort is required, and in oder to help another, one has to think about someone other than the self.

I do strongly believe though, the most impactful to help society is one on one.  That's how communities were done before industrialization it still is because everyone wants to know somebody cares about them, that their life matter.  The teanager you turn your face away from when you pass them on the street was once a cuddle little baby you would coo and "gobble-de-gook" to when you met the mother in the supermarket or at the bus stop.  Why not look the teen in the face and say hello, or good morning or good evening when you pass them on their way to school or where ever?  They are people too you know, yes it's an ackward phase in life but I do believe this is a way to bridge the gap and help them transition to adulthood.  Saying hello acknowledges them and tells them you are not afraid of them. You know something else, have a conversation with a young person, you would be quite surprised how intelligent and insightful they are.

Making your mission, reach out and touch somebody's life today.

MissSam